puzzled and used, lost and confused- that was my usual excuse for putting off things i should be doing. im not that naive to not know the importance of time. maybe im just scared- i have always been scared all my life. scared of failing, scared of messing things up, scared of taking responsibility for anything, scared of getting hurt and disappointing people that i care about. i guess in my unusual cowardice, i have been avoiding living life itself and discovering the true meaning of happiness. hopefully this year, i'll be able to get up from the deathbed that i built myself, and start reviving the breath of life thats almost gone... i have to- now that a new innocent life is inside me. i must be brave and equipped to face life and start to live it...